What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

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Your Mama's so fat that the Doctor recommended a healthy eating diet, and to exercise daily.

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

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Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

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Why did John get hard? He froze to death

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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A rabi and a priest go out for a coffee they talk for a while and go on there way

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Jimmy: I'm like hey, what's up, hello. Jon: I've already met you.

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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Why did the jewish family move? Their house burnt down. They lost everything and was tragic

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Mommy, why did daddy leave? Because you touch yourself at night sweetie.

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How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

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How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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