Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

Why did the man fall off his bike? Because he wasn't on a bike.

Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

What did one tree say to the other tree? Nothing, trees can't talk.

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

Daughter: Dad I have some news for you Dad: What is it? Daughter: I am pregnant Dad: ... I am so happy I am going to have a grandson, my 27 year old daughter just married and now pregnant, this is a great day!

Little boy: Daddy, daddy, I know what i want for Christmas! Dad: Oh really? and whats that? Little boy: I want a bicycle! Dad: Why my son? You are already on a wheelchair...

Q: What's worse than finding out you have genital herpes? A: Finding out your grandmother gave them to you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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