Knock Knock Who's there? The Police your parents just died in a car accident

What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

What happens when a chemist dies? They are given a proper funeral and buried.

A Christian asks god why there is so much pain and grief in the world. God does not exist.

Why did sara fall out of the tree? -she had no arms.. Knock knock. -who's there? not sara.

Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

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there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

How can you tell the difference between Brooke Colbert or any other girl Jesse has been with? It's easy, Brooke the only one Jesses ever been with. They even share the same bra size.

Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? TO GET TO THE SAME SIDE!!!BAZZINGA!!!

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

Q: Santa Clause, the Tooth Fairy, and a rich mexican jump out of the plane at the same time. Who hit the ground first? A: The answer is none of the above, because they don't exist.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

What do you call a white guy in a joke? The first joke to specify one of the people in the joke as one with Caucasian origin.

Why was the boy sad? I don't know, what do think I am? An umbrella? Why would you even think FOR A MOMENT that it's OK to just ASK me random stuff? Do you have ANY IDEA who I am?! I'm your worst nightmare, and if you ever ask me ANYTHING without permission again, or so help me I will drown the nearest pet goldfish. P.S. His cat died.

Why couldn't the ten-year-old get into the pirate movie? Because it was rated PG-13

why wont me daughter eat my feces

why was the female student failing out of school? because she made bad choices and never gave school her all.

What did one sexy babe say to the other? We are sexy

Your mother is so poor that she has to rely on government sent cheques to sustain a basic lifestyle.

why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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