What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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What's worse than biting into an apple with a worm in it? Getting brutally raped by a giant transvestite donkey witch.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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So a man walks into a bar and he says "Can i have two beers?" The bartender says "Sure, Budweiser or Heineken?" The man responds "Uhmm... which one do you prefer?" The bartender says "Heineken."

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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Q: How do you keep an idiot in suspense? A:

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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What do the Mexican man, the Asian man and the Jewish man all have in common? "man"

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Why didn't Megan do her homework? Although Megan was an intelligent girl who had always done well academically, she remained unconvinced that anything taught in school held practical or philosophical importance.

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Whats black and white and says moo? A Dalmatian retriever with a voice box.

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How do we stop world hunger? We must first ask ourselves: why don't people eat?

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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Two kids are playing basketball. One says to the other, "FAILMUFFIN!" The basketball flies out of bounds.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Run Quick, Before I Rape you!!!

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You'er moma is so stupied that she climbed over the glass window to see what on the other side

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Hey are you sleepy? Good, cause I just saw Jeff The Killer and Slenderman outside your window. Good night!

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What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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Whats the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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Why did the jews get off the bus? Because i threw a fridge at it

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops