bob said "Hi Joe why the long face" Joe replies "I'm a horse dip sh*t"

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Why do girls swim naked in lakes and oceans? so they have an excuse why their pussies smell like either tuna or cat fish.

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How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

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Do you still got what it needs to become a better leader than me Nero?

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what's worse than finding 8 dead babies in 1 trash can?....... 1 dead baby in 8 trash cans.

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Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his village.

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What do people and jelly beans have in common? Nothing. One is a living creature, and the other is a tasty treat.

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Why did the blonde go to law school? She was sick of people assuming that she was not an intelligent woman due to negative sterotypes about her gender and hair color and set out to prove said people wrong.

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Knock Knock ...Does anybody know how to use a goddamn door bell these days?

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Ok everyone, you know that kid that after his joke he'll put louis on the bottom because that's his name? He sucks at joke telling and if you see any of his jokes, DISLIKE THEM!

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What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

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what did the doctor say to the wery fat man? you have diabetes

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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Girl fight: Teachers take them to dq Boy fight: Lunch and recess in the library.

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Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

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Where's my baby??

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

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mitchell palmer sucks

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Straight man: Gays can't have babies so they shouldn't be allowed to have sex. Gay man: But you got a vasectomy last year, so you can't make babies either. The straight man sees the irony, realizes how judgmental he has been and never has sex again because he maintains his opinion that gays shouldn't have sex.

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Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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