Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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Your momma is so ugly she gave freedy krooger nightmares!

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

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What's red and sweet and good to eat? A riddle that rhymes.

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If you have a stroke, call 000

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How can you tell a blonde a brunette and a red head apart? Ask them if that is their natural hair color.

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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Q: why wasn't the fan spinning? A: because it wasn't on. Duh....

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He couldn't, his legs were broken

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I SWEAR TO GOD I'M NOT GAY! But my boyfriend is. Love you, Jeff.

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An innocent man's home was raided by police, who accused him of grand theft auto. It turns out it was just a case of mistaken identity.

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Why is Brodie Invited to Orlando? To make the beds

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Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

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They see me rollin' They hatin' Patrolin they try to catch write a joke Try to catch me write a joke Try to catch me write a joke (tootle loo, I see you ;)

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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10 years later...... a baby is born in Japan and has 26 toes due to radiation

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Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown who the hell took a shit in my garden?

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Guess what? You guessed it.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops