What do you get when you cross Dracula and a snowman. Probably a little startled from the man's Dracula costume and a little chilly because the weather is cold enough to support a snowman.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

When is the only time you see a Mexican and Black person driving together ? When they feel like it .

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Fenestrade De Riguerto sat aloft his might horse Bentereuse and called for his brigadiers. At home his wife was opening a package. 2 minutes later a sound could be heard reverberating across the countryside. It was the invasion fleet from Denarus V wiping out humanity

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the girl with a striped ball fall over? She was a victim of a drive-by shooting.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

thumb_up thumb_down +12

— Knock knock. — Who's there? — Funny. — Funny who? — A funny joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Yo momma so fat her pancreas doesn't work anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What's big, purple, and smells like children? Barney

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She doesn't have arms. Knock, knock, Who's there? Not Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

are you from tennesse? cuase you sure look like a f u c k e d up redneck

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? A: A bus stop

thumb_up thumb_down +12

yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Click here to end the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worse then failing a test. Being raped by a horse

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops