Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

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Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?? Blue.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a doll house in her back yard? -No Neither did she

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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A blind man walks into a library.

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What's black and doesn't work? Half of Detroit.

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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did you hear the one about the elephant with a screwdriver? me neither...

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Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar They are friends and continue to have a pleasant evening

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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What do you call three Asian people eating a cat? A tragic last resort for a starving family.

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How do you get a blonde's attention? Throw deodorant at her until she looks.

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How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops