Knock knock! Go away. I'm busy masturbating, and it would be extremely awkward if you were to entire my residence at this time. Please return at a later hour.

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

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What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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In Soviet Russia a lot of people were killed for voicing their opinion against Stalin

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A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

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knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

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what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm allergic to both Now I'm dead

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

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What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

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Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

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What's the difference between an orange? A bicycle because a vest doesn't have any sleeves.

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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why shouldnt you throw a rock at a black guy on a bike? Just because its not very nice.

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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