Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

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Joker: You wanna know how I got these scars Me: The Bat... Joker: The Batman!

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What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

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-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

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Q: what's red and covers an elementary school wall? A: a red crayon

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

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You know what's funny? A well told joke

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He was perfectly happy where he was.

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what would u do if you were having anal sex with a black guy and his penis was sooooo big that it ripped ur asshole? staple it back together

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A muslim man takes a flight to New York. He lands safely at JFK airport.

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What do the Mexican man, the Asian man and the Jewish man all have in common? "man"

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Jimmy went for a walk in the jungle, and he got lost!!

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What's funny? Women's rights.

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What do you do if you walk outside and see your t.v. floating in the lawn in the middle of the night? Go back inside.

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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I Never apologize, I'm sorry, that's just me

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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Why did the blind man get hit by a bus? Because his seeing-eye dog was distracted by a squirrel and ran off, leaving the man in the middle of the cross-walk in heavy traffic.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops