How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Nickelback

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why did the black person cross the road to get to his lynched sister

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't move? A child born in Chernobyl.

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What is 9+10? 19

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Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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A man from timbuktu slept on a bed of nails. It was very uncomforable

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Angus is so Scottish he wears a kilt when it is socially appropriate.

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What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

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Why did the plane crash? because there were two towers in front of it.

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I have read the terms and conditions

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So a cat a dog are in a field.The dog then proceeds to eat the cat and take a nap

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Chris is hairy

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Why did the shark attack the rock? Because it thought it was a human.

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There was an elephant , a bird, a man, a tree, a cat, a dog, a lion, a horse, a cow, a pig, a duck, a lemon, a turnip, an apple, a rabbit, a slice of pizza and a spoon. I just wasted around 8 seconds of your life

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what did the man say to then other man when he said a joke, "Ha"

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Last words of a redneck - "Hold my beer and watch this"

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Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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