had a good wank over anime yesterday xoxo dylan hodge

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Im sitting in class trying to write a joke. I should be writing my speech But i'm better off trying to think of the funniest joke that could get on the front page with over 9000 likes :( Lol nah thats never going to happen :'(

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This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

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What do you get when you cross an Indian and a duck? An Indian duck.

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Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

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A dinosaur walks into the bar, everyone panics in fear and confusion because it is a dinosaur and it's weird.

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whats bloop with an m? matthew

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Whats brown and sticky? A antelope.

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Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

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What do gamers call an abortion on quintuplets? PENTAKILL!!!

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Lady is taking her Alzheimer grandpa to shop for his birthday. Parks, gets out and opens the door for him. He looks at her and asks? Who are you?

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What's worse than getting pulled over by the police? getting pulled over and getting a bloody tampon stuck to your forehead.

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Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

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What's Tyrion Lannister short for? It's not short for anything, it's his full name.

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Whats the difference between a duck? Both legs are of the same length. Especially the left one.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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A storm be brewin!

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Why did the cave men discover fire? They were the only humans on earth.

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Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops