In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: To get to your house. A: Knock-knock B: Whose there? A: The chicken!

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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Person 1: knock knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: nobody Person 2: nobody who? Person 1: ............

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Whats brown and rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? -- Because it was dead Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? -- Because it was stapled to the squirrel

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Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

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One time there was a man walking down the street. Wrong, it is physically impossible to walk down a street, you can only walk along it.

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Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

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What happened to the Jewish man while he was in the shower? He accidentally fell asleep and was late to his job.

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Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

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How many Jews can you fit inside a car? Legally somewhere between 2 and 9 depending on seat belt availability and passenger space.

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How do you stop a baby from spinning round a washing line. Hit it in face with a baseball bat.

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hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple...... some of these jokes

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Why was a white man mowing his lawn ? The lawn was getting undesirably long which provoked the white man.

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

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what did the robber say to lady gaga to get her in the car?get in the car or i shoot you i just want your money!!

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"Bitches are fake, talk shit get hit!". False, female dogs cannot speak in the tongues of humans, and if they could I am sure excrement would not come from their mouths.

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Three dogs are barking at a wall. People walk by thinking "Why are these dogs barking at a wall?".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops