Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Where it had just witnessed a horrific car accident involving it's spouse, who died on impact. Eventually the chicken fell into a deep depression, taking it out on his children in the form of physical abuse. Over time, the chicken ended up being alone, having no contact with his kids, having no friends, and living in a massive house with no one else. One day, he had a stroke, and no one called an ambulance because no one knew.

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tell ur mom i love her before i die this would have been a better ending to the tintanic

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How can you tell I'm the biggest idiot in the room? Look at me.

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Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

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Why did the hobo get hit by a bus? He wanted to kill himself.

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A priest and a small child enter a bar. The bartender takes his son back from the priest, paying him $30 for his exemplary babysitting services.

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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If god gives you lemons keep the lemon go to the store and buy oranges to make orange juice.

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A man walks into a bar. The other patrons suddenly start to run away screaming, because he had just been hit by a bus.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Why did the girl run over the road? Her buttons rolled to the other side! (From a book called... Al-capone does my shirts) (Natilie)

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What's Black,White and red all over? A black person with a skin disease on her period.

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Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

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I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

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Simon says, "I'll give you a five second head start before I mow you down with my AK47."

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wanna hear a joke womens rights

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Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

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Roses are black. Violets black. Guns are black. My van is black.

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What do you get when you cross a Chinese man with a dog? A happy Chinese man and a pile of dog bones.

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So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue You wouldn't know that Cause you're a dog.

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops