Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?" Oh ya he had alzheimers.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? a Jew is a person and a pizza is a food

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man in a wheelchair walks into a bar... ...wait a second.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is both bold and brash? Fox

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's gay and Jewish? Henry Shine

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Does an albino chameleon turn different shades of white?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

teacher: what is your name? student: some people call me attractive (mx)

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's old and wrinkly? old people

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A black person went into a store and paid full price for his tv

thumb_up thumb_down +5

So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walked into a bar. I shot him

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Wanna hear a funny anti joke?...........................................................................................Funny anti joke

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

You are a special guy, and I mean that in a really sweet way, but a retard no. Synapses, tell me more please.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is the difference between a feminist and a gun? A gun only has one trigger

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops