There once was a man called steve, His name was steve

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one stop shop

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How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

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Penis

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Cat ate a battery, did volts.

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

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A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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How do you kill a blonde? There are a variety of methods, but I prefer a fine mix of insecure clowns and pepto-bismol.

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What is worse then finding an apple in your worm? Not a lot.

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I will slam your FACE into the BOOK if you don't stay out of MY SPACE

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Tim likes girls

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Uh Erron, you know, I do not spend most of the time before this computer or studying because I am popular nor anything, so that`s one thing, and yeah, I never done it with anybody so yeah, uhh lucky me or something.

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A Penn State administrator walks in to a butt.

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You know what's cool? Yep.

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Steve buys 60 watermelons.. What does he have? A lot of watermelons.

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a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown who the hell took a shit in my garden?

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yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

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Why did the man's pants fall down? He was not wearing a belt and had recently lost some weight.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a bus.

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What do a boat and a computer have in common? Nothing

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What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops