I used to know what alzheimers was

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken have a sore neck? Because the farmer cut the chicken's head off, and the body ran around for three minutes until it finally bled to death.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How many babies could a cannibal eat? 132/267 of a baby

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, But the very next day, I died.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the Mexican man grow a mustache? It wasn't his choice. Men naturally grow facial hair and he ran out of razors.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did t chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock, knock. Who's there? The chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Kony 2012 - Uganda Be Kidding Me

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you call a calculator without a brain? A calculator.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A boy kills DEER & cooks it & doesn't tell friends what it is. He gives a clue "Its what my girlfriend calls Me!..

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is worse than when the Titanic sunk? You Cannot say. You were on that ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A 3 year old child walks into his parents having intercorce the child asked "mommy what were you and daddy doing" she says "sex" the child was scarred for life.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

obama

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why couldn't the black guy vote? He was only 17.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Lisa fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. *Knock knock! Who's there? *Definitely not Lisa.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops