what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

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how do u make a baby cry? you shouldnt. Stop thinking of ways to make a kid cry... asshole.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your BANANA.

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There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

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What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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Q: Why do circles make such good friends? A: They don't. They're shapes and there cannot have friends

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A horse walks into a bar, it broke both its legs and was then put down.

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What did the homeless man say to the man who gave him change? “Mmmm I sure do love pocket lint”

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why did the Asian father want his son to be a doctor? because he wants his son to live good life so he could have a loving family and a payable job.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? Nothing, they were the ones convicted of raping that white girl.

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

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Last night I had a lovely chicken burger I had no mayo left so had to make do with coleslaw but enjoyed it anyway.

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Whats bent but straight for danielle? Joseph Plummer

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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A woman woke up next to her husband that was already awake. She said "F*** you" and walked out of the house. On the other side of the world, a horse is giving birth to a chihuahua.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

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How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

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How do you know that an elephant has been in your refrigerator? The door is ripped off and the refrigerator is lying on it's side. All the shelves are strewn around the floor and your food has been partially eaten or simply crushed. You also have costly damage done to your house and most likely a frightened elephant in your house

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You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

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What do you get when you mix a bulldog with a shitzu? One delicious smoothie.

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Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

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What had 82 eyes, 7 mouths, and sings the blues? Nothing, the described creature does not exist.

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Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops