- Anti Joke

How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

Why are Asians yellow? Because that is their natural skin color

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

What do you call a German who roasts Jews for a living? A comedian.

A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

Why did the fisherman go to Alaska? The commercial fishing business is strong there and it was a sound financial decision.

an englishman,scotsman,and irishman walk into a bar the englishman says " a pint of lager please" "that will be 10pounds , says the barman "Im not paying that , ill see you in court" says the englishman . The same thing happens , in turn to the scotsman, and irishman ,and a summons is issued. In court the jugde says "why are you charging drinks too dear?" the barman says "im not, im selling them to a englishman ,scotsman, and a irishman..

Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

... a man has made himself a poop sandwich , refused to eat it and threw it away because it disgusted him ....

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

How did the Cuban get into Florida? Well he got his passport and other papers, flew in, then went to Customs.

how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

I found my car in the lot with a broken tail-light and a note under the windscreen wipers. I accidentally reversed into your car, Lots of people saw me do it. They all think I'm writing down my name and details, Well, I'm not.

An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

In the middle of english class, Little Timmy raised his hand and asked "Can I use the restroom" The english teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Little Timmy said "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?

how do u have sex with a really hot girl who is not interested in you? Rape her in a dark ally

what cuts the grass on christmas eve and lives in mexico? JP I lied about Mexico jackin it in san diego

Justin Beiber

Sex education in Texas,

Wihat's red, green, and goes 100 miles an hour? A frog in a blender!!!!!

This is on of those few moments where my guts and attitude leave me feeling as if the entire world is against me... ...Then I cant help but to smirk and think... The world against me? Finally a worthy challenge... Such a great day... Nero because fuck morals: Friends and not so friends do not call me Black Metal because I listen to power rock, my mother high on drugs attacked my wife claiming she was Satan, I killed my angel dust empowered mother, felt as if the world was against me... ...Such a great day... "I killed my father too but you dont hear me whining about it!" And of course... ...Rest in pieces oh "dear" mother", at least you did one good thing, you gave birth to your undertaker, while I killed you to end my lifelong misery, My only regret is ending yours... Now I request you all think I am a monster and pretend we live in a world where all parents are nice and good... You already deluded yourself? Perhaps you should thumb me up instead then.

Why was the black man killed? He committed a serious crime and was issued the death penalty.

what do you call your mom? mom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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