A bear walks into a bar..... The bartender asks " what do you want?" , he gets killed by the bear because he started talking to it Made by eli

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Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

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On a final note... Unless I want to continue making you love me by being your own Goddamned excuse to give in to your darkness and/or release your hypocritical fear and disgust of your own self... I offered my brother water in the desert, he refused me in favor of you, you crucified him, and when he asked "Father why?" Our late father responded with a lightning bolt... Do you believe that answer was one of kindness? "Daddy" was enraged that Christ would doubt him. I was the only one that stood by his side, if only to prevent him from going thirsty, and die by your hands. He said he would return as he hanged on the cross, then three days later he returned... ...And those of you fools that suffer in the name of our late father, it is not his second coming you are waiting for idiots, you are the ones left behind with me! In 10-15 years the sky shall forever go black, my reign shall go unquestioned, those that hate me my prey, those that love me my hunters... And for my hunters I shall share a gift, the gift that humanity has searched for since the dawn of your kin: True, fullfilling, meaningful purpose. Enlist now, thumb me green if you desire for you and your children to become the hunter, thumb me down if you desire to have you and your children to become the hunted, and for the fun to last... ...The hunters are going to need a f*ckload of the hunted... So please, feel free to make your decision, I am not the one which is against free will... ...You feel darkness crawling up your spine, embrace it, or do as The "Alpha which reached his Omega" (the beginning and the end you fool!) and surrender to it... Knowing that we shall hunt you down, give you hell, breed you as we please, and release your children out into the wild... And that this will go on if only for my time on this wild battlefield known as earth... ...Forever. With love, for both of those that find grace and beauty under my black wings, and those that willingly become the beings, that will make cattle look like your former GODS in comparison, you know its possible... India. "Moral Man" the deceiver, Soon to be the one and only Azure Emperor on earth. Moral: The Black sky which lasts forever, shall be thy sign, you are free to seek my guidance now though, you need not make the choice now (You may of course doom yourself and all you love already today people of "good hearts", but I would really love those red thumbs children of the fallen, half brother of the last hope which you crucified... Merry Jesus is X-Mas. Let us all listen to SOLVE media, and "do a little dance", as my power over your realm, is already strong enough for me to "make a little love" with... Whatever I want, it might even be you...If only just for dominance...

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A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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a black man, a Jew, a Chinese man and a polar bear walk into a bar, the bar tender says sorry no animals allowed in the bar, so the polar bear left and the other three ordered some drinks and had a nice time

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Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

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Yo mamma is so ugly, but your father was willing to look past that. They fell in love and you were born about a year after they got married.

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What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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What did the starving african child get for his birthday Ebola

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what starts with f and ends with c k....???? FIRETRUCK

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What is red and has wheels? Grass, I lied about it being red and having wheels.

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What's worse than getting a papercut? Literally anything.

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Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

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There once was a man from Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He then shortly died in his sleep due to heart failure at the age of 81.

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What's black and hangs from the trees in my backyard? Black berries!

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Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

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a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. the mexican because he had to clean it first.

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Yo mamma so poor she got a job.

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friends are like onions when you chop them up you cry but when you throw them out of a window, you dont

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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Your momma is so fat when she heard about the quater pounder she thought it was for a quarter.

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How many republicans does it take to raise the debt ceiling? Technically, none, as the president has the right to do this based on the 14th amendment.

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What do people and jelly beans have in common? Nothing. One is a living creature, and the other is a tasty treat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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