What did a pornstar say when she heard hard banging from the front door? Come inside.

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Why is Henrik so AWESOME? Cos HE just IS!!!!

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Chuck Norris walks into a bar, the bartender says ouch.

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what is Rebecca black's favorite restaurant? Ruby Tuesdays

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. She didn't. She's still in the kitchen because I beat her if she's not cooking or cleaning.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

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Why did the little boy grow up to be a homosexual man? He didn't find the female reproductive system sexually appealing

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Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

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What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

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How is a woman like a condom? They are not. A woman is a human being and a condom is a man-made rubber object used as contraception in sexual intercourse

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What did the little boy get from his parents on Christmas? Nothing. His parents died 2 nights before in a tragic car crash.

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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What's funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed as a clown.

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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Lebron James got a new iPhone, but he has to keep it on vibrate because he doesn't have any rings.

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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What's half of 8? o

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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What did little Suzy get for Christmas? Molested

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench can support a family

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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