Roses are red.........I slept with someone else

So a guy is playing jeopardy and decides to choose the category "Therapist." so he tells the host, "I'll take the rapist for 200."

How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

Ross.

Knock Knock Who's there? ........

How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

How many blonde chicks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Two. One to set the house on fire, and the other to call 119.

What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

Why was the fat lady on the Medicine ball? Because she was fat!

once i was a dog and u were a flower........... i raised my leg and gave u a shower :)

Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

What's the best thing about shrimp? It never goes bad.

The New York Giants

In mother Russia you don't eat cookie. Dog eat shark. -B.Gill

Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet, but she had anal hemorrhaging so it really hurt

Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

Why did the girl fall off the swing ? Because she lost her balance and the force of gravity put upon her was too great for her to bear, resulting in her fall.

"knock, knock" "who is there?" Gestapo

Theodore was a small kid that lived down the street. Little did he know, that Kaiwen the Poor Pedo was his next door neighbour. So he was walking one day down the street. He saw Kaiwen dead. Because he ate too much sugar. So Theodore called the police. But his phone broke suddenly. Theodore realized that his brother had filled it with broken eggshells. He was sad. He took out a few golf balls and stuffed them in his mouth. But he couldnt forget taht a fellow neighbour had died. He buried the body beneath the Carpet of Ol' Justin's House. He wasnt happy. His dad confiscated his laptop. And the golf balls

Q: Why did the girl fell from the swing? A: Because she had no arms.

A horse enter a bar, and the barman says: "why the long face?" The horse has cancer

GUESS WHAT ?????????? THATS WHAT CAOMHIN

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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