How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Why are black people not allowed to play football? They are.

What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

So, why won't the blonde date the Asian guy? Because she's afraid of commitment.

Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

why did the boy get hit by a bus because he dropped his ice cream

What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

Why did the boy live on the street? He was an orphan.

*knock knock* i have diarrhea

Gordon Brown smiles.

Knock knock. ... There was no reply because the resident was on holiday.

What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

CJTheBEST Sticks and stones, May break my bones, Because i have osteoperosis

What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

Your mom's so fat that when she stepped on the scale at the doctors office the doctor said " hey i wanted your weight not your phone number"

How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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