What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

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How many gay people does it take to make a football team? 11

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Why was the kid running around? He was on fire

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Go away nothing to see here,. I said go away

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rocky was chasing him

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

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What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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True or false , is it hotter in the summer or in the city? False, because blue monkeys don't eat orangutan bones.

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How do you drown a blonde? A: Drowing any person no matter the color of their hair is conpletely illegal and considered murder.

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what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

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Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

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Just want to know where I will be dipping my... MANFLESH!

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

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What did the man say to the prostitute? Can I pay you to come with me to a cheap motel and partake in sexual intercourse with me?

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

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Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops