A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

What do you call a Jew A Jew

Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. An orange.

How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

Why didn't Jimmy ever get his butt of the couch? His butt was nailed to it and he was also dead. Why didn't his parents save him? they died before he did.

What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

why did the holocaust not die because black people are scared of fuck

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a prison. They're stopped by a gang. Hey, want to play a game? They answer "No thanks, we died in the last joke."

eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

An Asian, white, and a black man decide to play Russian Roulette. The Asian goes first and shoots himself in the head. The white man picks up the gun for his turn. The black man runs down the street screaming. Cops see him and the white man holding the gun, both are sent to jail for life for the murder of their friend.

What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He thanked the gracious african-descented donor, and with a little luck he just might see his beautiful wife and kids again

George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

Knock, Knock! Go away!

Whats the difference between a white man and a black man? black people have more melanin in their skin causing it to pigment and turn black

Someone just commented on my joke! ... oh wait it was myself

What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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