i used to take arrows to the knee,til i took one to the balls.

Q:What did the duck say to the other duck A:We are both ducks

Why did the boy stop singing? Because his lungs collapsed.

what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

Why did the boy cross the road? He was visiting his dying grandmother at the hospital.

Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

A man walks in to a bar, what does he say? Ouch.

I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

What can't catch or throw? A Quadriplegic

What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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