The cream, it is coming

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

What do you call a black guy that drives an airplane? A pilot.

I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

Who always participates in "No shave November"? The homeless.

What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

If you eat a brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundae, your tastebuds will likely turn purple and move to France, where people don't eat brussel sprouts-and-ketchup sundaes.

Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

An old asian woman is driving down the freeway a drunk driver merges into her lane. Everyone is ok because she keeps a safe distance behind.

Wats blue and always in the sky?? Cheese! Except cheese is not blue and it is not always in the sky... By Rachael Mcmullan

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...