What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

Q: What happens if you pee on a rock and scraches it on a tree? A: The tree gets wet

What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. *leaves*

Why did the bunny give you a funny look? It has epilepsy.

whats the difference between a Jew and a piece of pizza? pizza doesn't scream when its in the oven.

Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

What's worse that getting raped by a frog? That would never occur, as frogs do not have genitalia to commit rape.

Go away nothing to see here,. I said go away

What do a lamp and a elephant have in common? Big ears, except for the lamp, it doesn't have ears.

What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

A husband and wife just had a baby, and he came out black.

Whats funnier than 24 ? 25

roses are red violets are blue im much younger than i look;)

What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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