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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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What's worse than the holocaust? The holocaust was one of the most terrible incidents in history there are very few things worse than.

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what did the person with yellow teeth and the person with white teeth have in common? they have a nose.

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Why did Steve put his trumpet in the fridge? He had begun the early stages of dementia and was becoming increasingly confused and detached from reality. Also he was German.

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If Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and Charlie Sheen were in a room together and you had a gun with two bullets, who would you shoot? Well Hitler and Bin Laden are already dead, and Charlie probably wouldn't die. Plus, I honestly don't think I could bring myself to shoot someone.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

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How did the Black man die at the KFC? Someone killed him.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Why do the following sentences never have anything to do with the roses and violets?

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Q: What did the dog say the cat? A: nothing, because dogs cannot speak, and even if they could, I highly doubt they would speak cat.

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

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Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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What's the difference between a woman and the Universe ? One is full of mysteries mankind may never understand, the other is, well, the Universe.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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So a man walks into a bar and gets drunk.

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

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What do you call a half-Latino, half-Asian baby? The product of a healthy interracial couple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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