A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

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guess what happened to ur mom? my mom is ded... oh...

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How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? A car crash.

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Raveena Thandhan

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Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

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Why did the Fly die? Cause it died the average life span is 30 days.

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A man walks into a bar and approaches a man "Ask me if I'm a tree." "Fine.Are you a tree?" "No."

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How do all Asians look? With their eyes.

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A man says hello to his best friend in the morning like he always does. Why did his best friend not reply? The mans best friend is not real and is actually a figment of the mans imagination because he has been suffering from a severe case of schizophrenia his whole life and has many imaginary friends.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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What is worse than writing a really terrible joke on anti-joke.com? Death.

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a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

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Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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guess wat chicken butt guess why chicken thy guess who chicken poo guess how he chickened out

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Friend's sister: how many seconds are in 12 o'clock Friend: alot Friend's sister: WELL THEN 12 O'CLOCK IS A REWERJAJSBDKDJDHRJRJFHFKRJRIDBDKSBSDJ *slams door*

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a lady says, " i cant stand this." Th guy next to her had his legs blown off and will never be able to stand again.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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