How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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Skinny people fart less.

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Stephen Hawkings may know everything about the universe, but try to get him to tie his shoes.

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Where do bees go to the bathroom? In the hive - they're incontinent.

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How do you call the uncle who molested you as a child? More than likely with a telephone.

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Im a Tree... BARK BARK!!!

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What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

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Q: GUESS WHAT IS REALLY BAD????? A: TITTY CANCER! :0

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I like cheese. You like cheese. Have a nice day.

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Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

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What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

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Robin, get in the car!

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What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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Stop looking at these jokes and go fuck yourself.

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You want some cake? Sure! Okay, go buy the ingridients and bake me some. YAY!

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A Black Guy, A Rabbi, And A Mexican walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says "Get Outta Here We're Closed!"

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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Knock knock Who's there? The interrupting doctor The interrupting doct... You have Cancer

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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XD A COZY FIGHT XD WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT? I am gonna kick your ass, break your face and then give you a kiss on the cheek as your mangled corpse bleeds out... XD :)) THANKS FOR THE LAUGHTER XD XD Reminds me of a former comment where you describe the local weather, you know, we do not live that far away from each other, hell it was actually the time, we are completely in the same timezone, so anyway, do you also get cartoon network on your television?

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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