why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent

ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

Knock Knock Who's there? The Gastapo

Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

Once upon a time, The end.

I was in the 74th hunger games I hid in the cornucopia until almost everyone was dead. Then I saw Katniss and Peeta so while they were distracted with night lock I pulled a rubber chicken out of my ass and beat the shit out of them till they died then I won the 75th hunger game also. They asked me to be there mocking jay but I killed them all and blew the plane up in the Capitol the end. By Adam Chebali

never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down

What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

What do you do if there's a black guy bleeding on your lawn? Help Him

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

Wanna hear a joke? Woman's rights.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

Friends are like trees, they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

daughter: Mum why do I have a brother mum: He not your real brother dont worry your adopted :) daughter: :'(

what do you call your mom? mom

What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

this new cologne, it's kind of gross smelling.

how do you break up with someone lightly and not hurt their feeling I dont want to hurt your feeling but i hate you

a jewish duck trips over a series of metal corckswcrews and proceeds to die of ADHD the answer is 4

What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting constantly tortured for hours non-stop by getting your eyebrows plucked out one by one and getting your teeth pulled out and getting your arms cut open by a razor and getting your nose twisted off and getting your nipples ripped off by a pair of pliers and getting your toenails scraped off by a knife and getting a needle shoved into your eyes and getting a sword stuffed up your arse and getting your penis split in two like a hotdog and getting your balls smashed up by a sledgehammer so the sperm inside goes everywhere. I think that would be worse than dropping a dollar down the drain.

How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

What did the kid with cancer get for christmas? A puppy, but it was left too long in a wrapped up box without air, it quickly suffocated and ruined the kids chirstmas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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