What do you get with you crossbreed a lamp with a chicken? Nothing... You can't crossbreed an inanimate object with a living being.

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Why did the Mexican cut his neighbor's lawn? His neighbor cut his lawn the previous week.

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Why did Susan fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock... Who's there? Not Susan...

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What's big and purple? Barney

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Why did Jimmy eat the apple? Because he was obese and needed to eat healthy because his doctor suggested it.

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Why Did The Man Fall Off His Motorcycle? Because he hit a bus.

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You smell just like a black person. With your nose.

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Knock, knock! Who's there? orange? orange who? orange ya glad i didn't say your family was dead.

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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Why was blueberry flavoured bubblegum cancelled? Because it tasted like soup.

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whats every colour and loved by everyone Mario

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What do you call 1 + 1 = 2? i like boobs

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Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

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School

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Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

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What happened to the black guy that rammed his ankle against the bed frame? Yelled profusely until it stopped hurting.

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What do you call a cow painted in red a cat ( PS : i lied about the cow + the paint ! )

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Q-what did lady gaga say to the retard when he asked why he's so stupid? A- Cuz baby u were born this way

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TIMMY

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Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a gun.

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What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops