How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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^ That's not even funny ^

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A giant meteor will hit the earth tomorrow.What do you do? Tell everyone I told you so.

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What if your name was Mr. David and the office called you down and you were wearing a dress?

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What's the difference between a Christian and a Jew? One believes in Jesus, the other doesn't.

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What did the caveman say to the dinosaurs, nothing dinosaurs are from the Triassic period 25 million years ago, while the origin of man came around 230000 years ago, so there would be a massive time difference and and would never seen each other.

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Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

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Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the other ____?

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Finn: Jake, why can your body do all of those magical things? Jake: What do you mean? Finn: Oh never mind. And they both proceeded to enjoy a delicious breakfast.

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NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

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Why aren't dragons real? Because if any animal were to breath fire (let alone have a gland that produced it), they would cease to live for their necks would scorch from the inside out.

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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Yo mama is so fat she needs to wear extra large.

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Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

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How did Helen Keller's Parents punished her? The put a doorknob on her door.

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What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

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ok, so a blue flower in a meadow dances valiantly, while being watched by a chipmunk. the king of the sky fairies ate an apple and a chicken and a pear, and a cumkwuat and frog legs and a bone and a library and a jeep and fig and a rhino and a sword but fairies don't have that big of mouths to eat all of that, so this never happened

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here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

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What did Steven Hawking get for Christmas? ------ ------ ------ A bike.

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hey i just met you,but this is crazy, my name is kony and i just took your baby

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What do you call a man holding a bible? A man holding a bible. What do you call a woman holding a bible? A women holding a bible. What do you call a man and a women holding a bible? A man and a women holding a bible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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