asians have slitted eyes lol

Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Ask me if I'mm a candy cane. Shutup, there are a lot of these types of jokes. Create your own you poophead.

What do you call a muslim with a gun I dont know his name

What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

What did the owl say when it fell out of the tree? Nothing. Owls don't talk.

k

knock knock... ...no answer

how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? Well, contrary to popular belief, it is NOT Master Pain's (Betty's) "butt". You would most likely get a bungee jumping owl.

Women's Rights

A little boy who was sleeping in his parents' bed woke up in the middle of the night only to discover his mother performing fellatio on his father. "Mommy, mommy," he said . . . except he didn't -- he said nothing, and the incident troubled him for many years.

What do you call a Black person in a city with high crime rates? Whatever their name happens to be.

what did the rapist say to the girl? get in the van

Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

did you hear about the two peanuts walking down the street? one was raped.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Um no horses are overrated.

Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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