- Anti Joke

What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? ...You mean, you don't know?

Q: What's worse than finding out you have genital herpes? A: Finding out your grandmother gave them to you

HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

Friend: Hey dude, you wanna come to my house after school and do some Meth? Other Friend: Nah I dont wanna get scabs all over my skin, disgusting teeth, and im not in the mood for dying early. Im good here.

What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

How do you piss off a jew slash his tires

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

What's the difference between Santa and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney.

What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

White men's rights

Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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why didn't the skeleton cross the road? He had no guts

The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

What did one hand say to the other? Nothing, you fool, hands don't talk.

What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, We've just had sex, Now you have aids too....

How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops