A man walks into a movie theater.and attempts to parate a film. He is then caught by employees of the theater and now faces fines and possible jail time for his actions.

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A guy walks into a bar. He has a couple beers, gets in his car and goes home. He got arrested on the way because it is illegal to drink and drive.

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

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What did Steve say when his leg got chopped off? Nothing, he went into a state of shock before blacking out due to loss of blood. Later on, he died, and a week later, a funeral was held, in which nobody showed up, because nobody cared for Steve.

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The graduate with a Science degree asks, "Why does it work?" The graduate with an Engineering degree asks, "How does it work?" The graduate with an Accounting degree asks, "How much will it cost?" The graduate with a Liberal Arts degree asks, "Do you want fries with that?"

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What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

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Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

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a man walks into a bar... his drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

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4 gay men walked into a bar. it was a gay bar. all 4 men had a good time

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why did john wear a red hat? because blue is his favorite color

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Roses are red. Violets are beer. Kay eckelkamp is in charge here.

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Your momma's so fat that she went on a diet.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

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What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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Why didnt Jimmy go to school on Thursday? Jimmy is a vegetarian!

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How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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