Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

why did John fall off his bike I don't know I was not there it was a rumor at school

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Skeletons neither have muscles nor brains to control any muscles and therefor cannot transport themselves across a road or any stretch of land for that matter.

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

knock , knock That Was The Same Mistake That Ann Frank Made.

When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

Knock knock Who's there? Miley Cyrus Holy moly, please come in! Here's your Miley Cyrus CD you order online Thanks you Mr. Mail Man

Why dont you greet your friend Jack on a plane? because you will say "hi Jack"

Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A very unfortunate blind fish.

Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

What happens when you forget your parachute as you jump out of a plane? You wake up.

Have you heard the one of the two headed man an the horse? Neither have I

What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

What did the Scientist say after he created Frankenstein? - I just created Frankenstein.

A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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