A black man walks into a bar, and when he left he paid his tab and couldn't have been more courteous.

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MURRRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Hickory dickory dock. Two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one; The other escaped with minor injuries.

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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I like that, yet I wonder if our subconscious knows what it is what we seek, maybe we need to tell ourselves that we will find happiness, and then the mind leads us there.

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sky silverstein

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Think of the worst thing you know of and add dead babies

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did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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A man walks into a bar

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What happened to Grant when he did a cart wheel? Chuck had sex with Victoria

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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Why was the black guy sad? Because he has a knife through his throat

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Tom: Hey Fred. Do you wanna hear a joke? Fred: Sure Tom! (long pause) (10 Minutes Later) Fred: Tom, I thought you were gonna tell me a joke? Tom: I did, the joke is that there is no joke.

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What did The Black man have for breakfast? Bran Flakes.

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What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

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why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

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How did the chicken cross the road?he just got up and walked to the other side.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? Cooked until it reaches an internal temperature of 180 degrees Fahrenheit to lower the risk of contracting diseases such as salmonella.

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Why did Biggie Smalls eat so much dark chocolate? His doctor suggest that he eat foods high in fiber.

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How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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