What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

a farmer asked me "were is my pig?" and I said ' I got hungry" :()

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

knock knock who's there? a dog ......dogs cant talk ..................

Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

If you were a pie I'd eat you

knock knock who's there? Police oh shit

What did the cannibal eat for breakfast? Waffles.

How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

A clown walking down the steet, trips -Ryan Vallee

knock knock. who's there? me. me who? shut up im robbing you.

A German and an American walk into a bar. George W. Bush got hurt, but Albert Einstein didn't.

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

If I had a dollar for every time I heard a 'women's rights' joke I'd be bill gates.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

Actually, Ylvis had a dog named Say. When he peed in the studio one evening, Ylvis said, "What the fuck, Say?"

What is worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? 1 baby nailed to 10 trees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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