Why can't Dave drive? Because Dave is an orange.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A: Caner.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What did Bambi say to her mother when her mother was killed? Nothing. Bambi's a deer. Duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Johnny has 32 cookies. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes, Johnny has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the little girl scream?She was afraid of clowns and hated small cars running around a tent at 6 o'clock at night

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What does a grandmas vagina taste like? I don't know -- nor do I want to.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Suicide Johnny and the Go Kill Yourselves

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's funny about cheese? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Why were 5 tall white guys sitting on a bench? They were in the NBA

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Know what's funnier than the holocaust? Almost everything i can possibly imagine. The holocaust was a terrible case of mass extermination due solely to naxis racist views

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Have you seen the movie "Gay Men Say No"? Oh yes, that is very insightful documentary on the modern day struggles of homosexuality.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops