You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

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What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Justin's life

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Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

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What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

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I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

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What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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What has two legs? Half a cat

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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Your Mother is so ugly that men tend to avoid her.

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why did the Japanese father cry? because when america bombed japan in wwll it happened to kill the rest of his family

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What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

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What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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