Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

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How do Germans treat the Jewish? Kindly, and with much hospitality.

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Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

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a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

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is this the krusty krab? no, this is patrick.

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Her Majesty's Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain

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Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

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Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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Why'd the dead man cross the road? He didn't, he was dead, therefore incapable of doing anything at all.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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How much hard work does it take to become a man? To get to the other side!

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What's the biggest lie you've ever told? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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Why did Timmy fall down the stairs Because he is blind and I pushed him

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whats your name whats the color of the sky whats the oppisite of down

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

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What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

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What's the difference between celery and a truck?

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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One day an irishman walked into a bar. he started to show off his accent when a nicely dressed lady said to him, "are you from ireland?". "AYE" said the irshman. " what part of ireland are you from?" drunk, the irishman replied "uh downtown" then the woman said, " did you come here alone?" then he replied"no i didn't come here a'lone.....DONKEY!!!"

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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