A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

Knock knock Whos there Who Who who Don't stutter it was just a joke

What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

What's the difference between communism and race mixing? Zey come for our blood, but drown in zeir ovn!!!!!

How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

Q: why didn't johnny do his homework? A:because johnny is dead

What did Jesse's friend say to Jesse? Hello Jesse

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he won't come anyways.

What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

Why did the fish look like a human? Because it was a person, drowning.

A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

Whats the difference between a black guy and a bucket of shit? A black man is a life form, more specifically a homosapian, while the bucket, as well as the shit, is an inanimate object.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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