whats fat round and bouncing off the ground= George goodburn

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Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

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Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

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A man walks into a bar. A few hours later he walks out.

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Hi welcome to yack in da box, can i hell you? Yes, could i have a jumbo jack? Jew wanna yumbo yack? Yes.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Duck, Duck who? Duck Sandwich

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I don't often drink beer, but when I do, I make the poor decision to attempt to drive while intoxicated, kill a pedestrian, and end up in jail with a hangover, a DUI, and an account of vehicular homicide. Don't drink and drive simultaneously.

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What do you call a Black man sweeping the floor? A janitor.

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What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.

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Whats worse then any minority? The fact they still exist.

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What did George Washington tell his men before they got on their horses? Men get on your horses.

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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A man finds out he was molested by his father as a child.

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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What do you call a dolphin without a head? Dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Obama. Obama who? Barack Obama, President of the United States. I was wondering if I could borrow a cup of sugar. I'm baking cookies for my family, because they really like my cookies.

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Yo momma's so hairy when you were born you almost died from rug burn.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 0

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There once was a man from Madrass, whose balls were made out of brass. This was incredibly embarrassing for him, and rendered him infertile and impotent, which in turn affected his relationships with women.

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Whats worse than Justin Bieber's love life. My ass crack.

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Q. Why did little suzy fall off her swing? A. She dosen`t have any arms. Knock knock. Whos there? Not Suzy.

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How many babies can you fit on a ferris wheel? None, babies aren't allowed to ride

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A man is watching a football game and sees a comercial for a medicine that boosts testosterone levels. However, this man has no issues with his testosterone levels, so he proceeds to watch the rest of the game and then goes to bed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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