Why did the chicken cross the road...

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No.. Neither have they.

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A gay guy asks a boy out and a girl The girl said no but the guy said yes And the two gay guys went to dinner And made out

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What do you call a Mexican hockey player? A hockey player.

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Why were you at a funeral? Someone died.

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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Why do blind people laugh at this joke? Because they can't read it and everyone else is laughing.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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Why can't a blonde swim? Because in this economy her parents never took her to a pool in which she could get swimming lessons and practice to be able to be a good or maybe great swimmer.

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

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What do call a spoon that doesn't work? Broken.

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What's black, white, and red all over? And interracial man with multiple stab wounds.

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What's worse than being raped by a giant scorpion? A holocaust in which all the Jews are raped by giant scorpions, and then killed.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender immediately shoots it in the face with a double barrel shotgun, ending the rabid animal's life

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whats funny about four dead horses in a park ? the horses are dead!

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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What's worse than discovering a hornet's nest next to your house? Being raped.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Sheriff Sheriff who? Sheriff Robinson your husband has died in a local car accident.

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My dog barks when someones at the door.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops