ms caissie is secretly laughing at these...

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What's the difference between a duck?

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of lollipop? unknown.

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Whats worse than a truck full of dead babies? A live baby trying to eat his way out.

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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One day a mexican guy came up with a great anti-joke about jewish guys. Upon sharing it with a canadian buddy of his, he collapsed and died from a cerebral hemorrhage where he was then hit by a bus and mauled to bits by a pack of saber-tooth tigers.

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why did the depressed man jump off the bridge? He likes bungie jumping, and wanted to cheer himself up by doing one of his favorite hobbies

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Why didn't the man win the lottery? Because his lottery numbers weren't drawn.

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Q: what's green and has wheels? A: a john deere tractor

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Why did Anna fall off her bike? She had no arms. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Anna.

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If youve ever seen the wizard of oz movie and family guy, then u get what i mean. Hes a PHONY! a BIG FAT PHONY!

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

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What is better then fisting? Fisting with a metal studded glove

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Columbine Massacre

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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One day a boy asks his teacher what blue velvet is then the teacher says "we don't ask questions like that in my class go to principal's office now"so the boy goes to the principal's office and then the boy asks "what is blue velvet"then the principal says"no one says that in my school get out" so the boy goes home and asks his mom what is blue velvet then his mom says you don't say stuff like that in my house get out!so the boy see's the Mayer. So the boy asks the Mayer what blue velvet is then the Mayer says no one says that in my town get out of my town! So the boy see's a man and the boy goes to the man and the man asks what happend to you and the boy says well I got kicked out of school kicked out of my house and got thrown out of town just because i asked what blue velvet is! So the man tells the boy that there is a lady across the street. So the boy is in the road and then the boy gets ran over and dies. So the lesson here is look both ways before crossing a street

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Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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