What's better than a stick? A stone

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

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Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

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what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

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What did God say to Abraham? Nothing, because God doesn't exist.

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

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How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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One day a black guy bought some fried chicken. The clerk said: Lol you guys always eat chicken! Lol said the black guy, yeah I am here a lot. Clerk: No I meant your kind of you know... I KNOW WHAT? Clerk: You guys at the studio next door! Oh, yeah, lol I almost thought you meant my skin color! Clerk: You fucking Negroes always thinking we are racist...

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Jack and Jill went up the hill. But it was winter and they froze to death

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Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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What fires shots? A gun

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What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

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What's gayer than Justin Beiber? The guy getting a blowjob from him! Kelvin Yang.

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What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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Why was the dog fallowing the fat guy. The fat guy said come.

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops