How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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Whats worse than 20 dead babies in a garbage can? A: The smell

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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Knock knock. Who's there. To get to the other side.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

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Apirl showers bring... Tornadoes that kill families

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Little Birdy: Are you my mother? Man: No, I'm a murderer. Get in the truck.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I have a gun. Get in the car.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new house? no. He didn't either.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

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a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

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why couldn't the girl sit down? she didn't have a butt.

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A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

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What did the oboe say to the trombone? SQUEEEEEEK

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You see this dick stop being a spick now suck on my wee wee u prick

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What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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Roses are black Violets are Black I'm Hellen Keller

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An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

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what does the doctor do when he tells you you have aids? he laughs and says "hahahahahhaha sucks for you, i dont!"

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Whats the difference between an american and a arab? Their Ethnicity.

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How are baseball and the holocaust similar? They're both games, except for the holocaust

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops