so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

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What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

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Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

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A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

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Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

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Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

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Have you seen the clown hiding from gay people at walmart?

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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Shltskc gw? G

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What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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Whats the difference between a pizza and your mom? Your mom's a bitch.

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Everybody love food when they are hungry

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Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

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What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops