What did Cinderella wear at the ball? Clothes

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What did the one alcoholic say to the other? We are both alcoholics

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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I was going to write a joke about procrastination, but I haven't gotten to it yet.

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How do you catch a green elephant? you paint it red and use a Red Elephant Trap

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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Why do dead babies go to funerals? They don't.

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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Besides the kama-sutra, what is the most popular sex position in India? 68 and 88. Moral: Mutation people... mutation... use your imagination.., Still gotta feel a bit of envy/admiration, it is known as the happiest nation of the world, with a happiness rate with a constant well over 80 percent, and that is FAR over any other nation.

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Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. Neither does the chicken. (you're supposed to laugh...)

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hi charles lattuca III

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Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

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How many cupcakes are there in the world joe How many? I don't know I was asking you.

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Barack Obama is a good president.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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Who is John Galt?

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Q: How to fit 10 babies in a suitcase? A: By blender Q: How to get the babies out of the suitcase? A: Using a straw.

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What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

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How do you kill a Chinese hobo Shoot him

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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