What came first the egg or the hen? your mother did, when I had sex with her last night.

knock knock whos there? IRS Oh....

A guy walks into a bar, sits down, and gives a heavy sigh. The bartender asks, "What's wrong?" The guy says, "Nothing."

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

What did the man with no head say to the women?

What did the boob say to the bra? sup bra

Wanna hear a joke? (Yeah, sure) So do I, got any?

Roses are red, Violets are violet. The man who wrote this, Was high as shit.

what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

Did you know that if you get all your intestines, and laid it out across the floor in a line, you would die?

What does a penguins wear on it's feet? Nothing penguins are incapable of wearing foot wear, also they do not have feet they are called 'flippers'.

What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because it wasn't a pilot it was a toaster.

yo mama is so fat that a kid said to her ' The White Buddha Has Returned'

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Want to hear a funny joke? Not really.

Q: How do you kill a goblin if the fries are next to the sushi? A: Yes. Walruses have nostrils and rubber chickens don't like microwaves!

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

The Chinese government. The way they treat their citizens just isn't funny.

If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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