why did the family get sick?? because i fucked a girl with a parsnip then sold the parsnip to a family with 4 small children

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Whats the difference between an american and a arab? Their Ethnicity.

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What did the man say to the prostitute? Can I pay you to come with me to a cheap motel and partake in sexual intercourse with me?

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Clause? Tiger Woods is a well-known golfer and Santa Clause is a mythical man who delivers presents to young children.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I have a gun. Get in the car.

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

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How are baseball and the holocaust similar? They're both games, except for the holocaust

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

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How did Helen Keller burn her hands? On a candle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? ... it wanted to cross the road.

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Why did a chicken cross the road? To see The Doors.

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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Shea's sty....

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Stephen Hawking is so paranoid, always looking over his shoulder.

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A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

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Q: What do you call a man with a spade in his head? A: An ambulance.

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What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

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What's the sexiest thing on a farm? It depends on what you find sexy, and your personal perception of a farm.

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Q: What did the guy say to the apple? A: suck me off

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what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

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Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops